This morning I felt really weird. It was like loneliness coupled with something else, something I couldn’t describe. As my tired brain wandered on the way to work, I wondered if I was feeling the way one does on the day you die. Do you feel different on your last day? Do you wake up just like any other day, or is there something else, some weird feeling in the back of your mind? But, I survived and nothing really bad happened. So much for that idea.
For the first time in as long as I can remember, I woke up for each one of my alarms this morning. I was thinking of going in for 6am this morning, so I was awake in time for that but then justified to myself that I shouldn’t bother on a Monday. So I reset one alarm and then didn’t wake up to it. Instead, I woke up 20 minutes after it had gone off and had to skip breakfast just to get to work somewhat on time.
i always feel overwhelmed with dread over going to work on monday mornings… i snooze for at least an hour, i stall while getting ready.. i usually miss my bus and i try not to think about walking into work on the subway ride/walk to the office. but then once i’m in.. i usually kind of get over it by lunch time and then i’m ready to get through the rest of the week pretty ok.
June 28, 2006 @ 7:25 am